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As the meeting wraps and your schedule allows, ask Joe (as in “cup of”) to stay. Wait until the room clears and then offer, “Joe, you are consistently late for this and several other meetings throughout the week. This causes us to revisit agenda items and conversations which wastes everyone’s time. It’s become a bad habit and could lead to a bad reputation for you. Neither of us want that. I [this team/department/company] value respect and collaboration. Your chronic lateness indicates you might not share those values. Give this conversation some thought tonight. Let’s meet tomorrow at 8am to review your plans to do better. I’m happy to brainstorm with you, if helpful.” This is a better response for a few reasons: 1) You don’t humiliate the human in front of their colleagues. 2) You quickly share your concern and the impact their behavior has on others and their reputation. 3) You assign them ownership of the solution and a deadline by which to apply it. You gain credibility by naming it instead of trying to make a joke or a dig. You also create a space for clarity. This human could be struggling and could use your partnership to help them reorganize or get organized. With empathetic statements and questions shaped with the right words, you can transform tardiness into timeliness and celebrate over an iced caramel macchiato next week…your treat.
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